Break...

Unlike Mom, I had a break this weekend. Usually I would go into the city to see Mom and Dad. Mom would get a chance to get out and I'd stay and look after Dad. Since Mom told me not to come I didn't. So the weekend was one great lazy day. We planted the rose plants that arrived from the nursery and put out the Christmas lights.

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You don't have to come if it's a burden...

Mom's never change do they? I've been going to Mom and Dad's every weekend since Dad got home. It was to give Mom a chance to get out of the house at least once. She called tonight to say not to bother coming on Saturday because it's a burden. The thing is, I don't see them during the week anymore since brother started the physiotherapy. So now I don't see them at all. I have to admit I was in a bad mood when I got there, but it was because my aunt (Mom's sister) started in on me as soon as I got through the door. If she would've just backed off a little it would have been manageable. Can't win this one.

So where to from here...

Dad has made incredible progress from a year ago when we thought the worst. I wonder now, about quality of life. What is it that Dad wants. What is it that Mom wants. It seems that we've been able to provide him with the necessities, but that's obviously not enough. What is Dad suppose to do with his days. Everyone needs purpose. Dad is no different. Daughter is going to be asking Dad about how the family got to Canada. It will give him a challenge to recall and it will give daughter a chance to learn about the family. I thought about Dad making something for charity, perhaps necklaces or bracelets type things. It may help with developing his dexterity as well. He used to buy Teddy bears at Christmas time for the charities and donate them.

Depression...

Dad is struggling with depression. He won't admit it, but you can see it on his face how unhappy he is. I can't blame him. It's not uncommon for retired men and women to get depressed after they've stopped working. Dad was a typical bread winner male. His purpose was to make sure the family was taken care of. He provided the income and fixed the house. He took Mom out grocery shopping and made sure all the bills were paid. But now, after retiring and after the stroke he isn't capable of doing there things. I can tell on his face that he doesn't know what his purpose is. He spends the days sitting watching television. Since he got sick he isn't able to walk much as he's so weak still. And the weather isn't great outside so taking him in the wheelchair for a walk isn't possible. So... what can Dad do that will give him a sense of purpose. He needs something to look forward to. He needs something that will make him want to get out of bed.

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Physiotherapy for Dad...

Dad's on a waiting list for the day treatment physiotherapy. He's #17. No telling when he'll start. Mom took the initiative and wanted to get Dad a private physio to come in. She asked Brother who tried to get someone to see Dad when he was in the hospital, barely able to move and comprehend. It wasn't appropriate then, but would be perfect now. Bonus is that the physio guy will come to the house for $30/hour. He's not licensed, but practiced in his home country. Brother at least will feel like he's contributed something and maybe will ease off Mom and stop berating her and blaming her for Dad's situation.

Because Brother won't go to the house if I'm there, I'll only go on the weekend for the next few weeks. The physio guy gets a ride with Brother to Mom and Dad's. So no Brother, no physio guy. I couldn't care less, but for Mom I'll stay back for now. You pick and choose your battles. This one is no biggie. Unless the unlicensed physio guy does some damage to Dad.